


Get Your Five a Day

by DoubleNegative



Series: The Beehive: 221Bs [14]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: 221B Ficlet, Actually two of them, Bad Jokes, First Time, M/M, Sexual Content, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, no bananas were harmed in the writing of this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-11
Updated: 2015-11-11
Packaged: 2018-05-01 01:41:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5187329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoubleNegative/pseuds/DoubleNegative
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You know how to eat a banana, don't you? You just put your lips together, and..."</p><p>Well, I might be misquoting. But Sherlock does know how to, um, eat a banana.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Get Your Five a Day

_Get bananas. -SH_

_OK. For eating only._

_Your demands are impossibly pedestrian. -SH_

John could practically hear Sherlock’s eyes roll in his reply, but he added bananas to his basket anyway.

The bananas sat untouched for several days, until one morning John wandered downstairs to find Sherlock peeling one. Sensually. John hadn’t realized it was _possible_ to peel a banana and make it look like sex, but damnit, Sherlock could.

He clasped the banana at one end, and with his other hand, delicately pulled back the peel, one section at a time, slowly revealing the pale flesh below. Once it was fully bare, he considered it for a moment, lips parted, eyelids drifting shut. He lifted it to his mouth and--

 _Christ_. John needed to leave the room, because apparently he got hard over his flatmate eating a fucking _banana_ now, and--

“Problem, John?” Was it John’s imagination, or did Sherlock’s voice sound even more sinful than usual?

“You’re just-- It’s very--” John waved a hand vaguely. “I mean--do you have to do that _here_?”

“I’m told kitchens are the traditional place for a snack.” He raised the banana to his mouth again, slid it between his lips. John tried not to whimper. “Or,” Sherlock said, after a moment. “We could forget the banana, and take this to my bedroom.”

 

* * *

 

John wondered if he should be ashamed that Sherlock’s line had actually worked on him. Wasn’t he meant to have more dignity than that?

Then again, if it _hadn’t_ worked, he wouldn’t be sprawled naked on Sherlock’s bed, with an equally naked Sherlock between his legs, applying his prodigious oral fixation to something decidedly more interesting than a banana.

 _No_ , John decided, gasping at Sherlock’s ceiling. He’d done what any right-thinking bisexual man with half a brain and a planet-sized crush on his flatmate would do. Entirely defensible.

Sherlock pulled off with a _pop_. “Stop thinking. I’m trying to blow your mind here; you could _try_ to pay attention.”

John giggled--couldn’t stop himself. “My _mind_ , is it?”

“Amongst other things,” Sherlock said primly, and reapplied his mouth. He moaned around John’s cock in the same way he’d moaned around the banana and John fought to keep his hips from jerking clean off the bed. “Oh-- Sherlock, _god_.”

Sherlock hummed again, and when John lifted his head to look Sherlock’s lips were stretched into a smile around him. It was over very quickly after that, for both of them, but the day was young. And there were a good half dozen bananas left, probably.

“John,” Sherlock mumbled into his shoulder. “There’s something you should know”

“Mm?”

“I don’t actually like bananas.”

**Author's Note:**

> Look, sometimes I think about suggestive fruits while I eat my breakfast sandwich, and sometimes I have to get the stupid jokes out of my system before I get back to work on my Serious NaNo Project. I'd apologize, but it's not like I'll never do it again...


End file.
